sparx1063's blog post - Feeling a little lost

Wednesday, November 7, 2018, 7:52:33 PM
In the past year I have had a wonderful time on this site - posting pics, videos, making friends, and simply enjoying being able to have a place where people enjoyed this side of me. Unfortunately this past June I had a house fire and almost everything I had - clothing, outfits, shoes, pumps, toys, videos and pics - was lost to the flame, smoke and water demons. Some was actually salvageable - but with my dressing and playing being totally under the radar and now having nowhere to privately and secretly stash what survived, I was pretty much forced to get rid of everything. So I am at a point in my life where I am definitely feeling a little lost - not only from not being in the house I've been in for 25 years but also from not being able to slip into some sexy outfit and film myself riding a big chunk of fake man meat. God, I miss the feel of sliding my legs into nylons and slipping on some sexy heels. I miss getting all dressed up and admiring how my body looked in a mirror - and then bringing out my pumps and working on my nipples. I miss how that dildo felt as it was stretching out my hole and then feeling every inch of it burrowing into my ass. I find myself an awful lot feeling like a rudderless ship - just kind of drifting around with no real outlet to dock anywhere. Shit happens in life and I'm not really here to garner any sympathy from anybody - just letting anyone who was wondering why I had abruptly vanished why it was so. Hang on to your passions no matter how difficult they are to accomplish - because if you are ever in a situation where they are impossible to achieve you will wish you had even a drop of some satisfaction. I don't plan on not drinking from the fountain again in my life - but getting to the point of where I was took years to accomplish, and the road back there will not be short. In the meantime I love coming back in here for inspiration - and it never fails to inspire!!

Comments

Others Have Said: 
dianne on 26-Nov-18 4:36:40
I know your pain back in the middle 90's I had a fire on the second floor. Thats where I kept all my girl things. Lost my wigs hundreds of pieces of jewelry and more important almost my entire collection of vintage girdles. About 60 of them smoke stained. I have tried to replace as many as I could but thrift stores around here no longer get them in for sale so that leaves Ebay and its just to costly to do that to much. Women just no longer wear girdles darn it. But after a bit the feeling of loss goes away and shopping for new things is a hoot so its not all bad. As my wife told me," hang in there buttercup" lol it will get back to normal

sparx1063 on 28-Nov-18 3:44:49
Thanks for sharing your story - it is appreciated. Yea the road back will not be all that bad, and it just might be taking an added twist. My wife, who did not know about my "other side", and I are really not on the same page in life anymore and it's pretty much a given that within about 8 or 9 months we won't be together anymore. Long story - but after 35 years together with different thoughts on different paths it just makes sense at this point to go our separate ways. So for me - no more hiding playthings, no more waiting until she leaves for a weekend to dress and enjoy my time, no more apprehension about shaving too much of my body, and no more trying to figure out how to purchase items without her knowing. So I guess there is a up side to this whole ordeal - it will take some getting used to being on my own again, but I'm thinking the first time I shave my whole body and slip into something sexy that it will be OK :)