In the past year I have had a wonderful time on this site - posting pics, videos, making friends, and simply enjoying being able to have a place where people enjoyed this side of me. Unfortunately this past June I had a house fire and almost everything I had - clothing, outfits, shoes, pumps, toys, videos and pics - was lost to the flame, smoke and water demons. Some was actually salvageable - but with my dressing and playing being totally under the radar and now having nowhere to privately and secretly stash what survived, I was pretty much forced to get rid of everything. So I am at a point in my life where I am definitely feeling a little lost - not only from not being in the house I've been in for 25 years but also from not being able to slip into some sexy outfit and film myself riding a big chunk of fake man meat. God, I miss the feel of sliding my legs into nylons and slipping on some sexy heels. I miss getting all dressed up and admiring how my body looked in a mirror - and then bringing out my pumps and working on my nipples. I miss how that dildo felt as it was stretching out my hole and then feeling every inch of it burrowing into my ass. I find myself an awful lot feeling like a rudderless ship - just kind of drifting around with no real outlet to dock anywhere. Shit happens in life and I'm not really here to garner any sympathy from anybody - just letting anyone who was wondering why I had abruptly vanished why it was so. Hang on to your passions no matter how difficult they are to accomplish - because if you are ever in a situation where they are impossible to achieve you will wish you had even a drop of some satisfaction. I don't plan on not drinking from the fountain again in my life - but getting to the point of where I was took years to accomplish, and the road back there will not be short. In the meantime I love coming back in here for inspiration - and it never fails to inspire!!

Hi all! If anyone has viewed my pics and videos you know I adore slipping into something sexy and filming myself playing with various toys. I really like the interaction though when I am on cam with someone - have connected with a few guys but I would love to get on cam with a gurl for some playtime. Planning on having some free time on February 16 and 17th and would love to find someone here to cam with. Anyone around have any interest in camming anymore? I know a real hook-up is better but unfortunately that is not in the cards for a couple different reasons - so I'd like to find the next best thing. I am definitely in the mood for something different - have been looking at the Oxballs Pit-Bull dildo and it has got my insides itching to slide it in and take a ride. Anyone game? Would probably use Google Hangout as my Skype seems to have taken a shit on me and I can't seem to solve the issue. Leave me a message here or PM me if it might be up your alley..

I got to wondering the other day just what it is that makes me wired to love crossdressing. I have always loved having sex with women in sexy attire - the visual stimulation of how it made their body look, the feel of a nice long pair of legs in nylons wrapped around me. I was first introduced to the dressing and bi world by a friend of mine about 45 years ago. I was getting ready to go into the military and 2 nights before I left he came out to me after inviting me to his apartment for some going away partying. Needless to say I was a bit shocked at first - it was something that I never in a million years would have guessed or even suspected. I had never been sexually with a guy before, but the sight of his hard cock outlined by red garter belt and nylons made it an easy transistion. We had hot sex that night, didn't really see each other for about 6 years, and never once was it mentioned between us.

That night stayed on my mind though - what was it like to slip on nylons and heels - to dress in a way that turned me on as a man. I played around with pantyhose for awhile - loving the way my legs looked and felt it them - but never really went any further until I got married. My wife was willing to let me buy her the sexy things that so turned me on and one weekend when she was away I decided I was going to try them on for myself. Oh my goodness the whole experience took my breath away - the first time I stepped in front of a mirror to take my dressed self in I just felt this warm tingle work it's way through my whole body. Damn - I looked and felt sexy as hell - and couldn't get enough of looking at myself. I was hooked - that was 32 years ago and I have been dressing when I can ever since. Buying my own clothes, wigs, heels - and doing a damn fine job of keeping my little secret all my own.

It still is my little secret - and I have ramped things up over time to include photos, videos, small toys, medium toys, large toys, and personal meets with admirers. I at times wish I was single again so I could fulfill that passion more often - there may be times when I go 2-3 months without getting an opportunity. But when I can I go for the gusto and get all I can - but it kind of makes me wonder if the thrill of it would still be there if I could dress anytime I wished. What exactly is it that makes me crave it so much? The sexual aspect - mmm, I love how I look and feeling a nice big dildo or cock in me and being videotaped doing it. I also love how I feel on my back with my legs wrapped around a guy - kissing and hot in an embrace as he slides in and out of me - pleasuring each other. What's the real driving force behind me - sex or passion? Both? Sometimes I wish life would just be simple.....

I'm going to give blogging a try here as I have a lot of things rolling around in my head and it seems like a good outlet. I had a wonderful time this last Friday night and all day Saturday dressing in some new outfits, snapping pics, and videotaping myself playing with some of my toy collection. Put a little twist in it Saturday night when I went on cam with a couple guys and watched them stroke one out while watching me ride my big black 12 incher. Wow - had been awhile since I had done that and I totally loved watching how they reacted to me - how they would moan more and louder with every inch more I would put inside me. How when I really started working it in and out and riding it like a wild little slut that they could no longer stand it and had to cum. The 2nd guy I swear shot out like tapping an oil well - his cum blew about a foot into the air and when he was done it almost completely covered his cock and hand - almost looked like he'd been ghostbuster slimed I could have made a meal out of it and it was just so damned pleasing to know that I had inspired that - that me riding that big piece of meat caused him to unleash a gusher of cum like I'd never seen before. Would I have liked an opportunity to lick and clean it all up? Most definitely - but just the thought that he paid such a tribute to me and my ass/pussy was in a way very satisfying - and very appreciated.